Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Those Were the Days

Saw a post over at OneUtah that got me thinking about the Bush years. It hasn’t even been 12 months since Obama was inaugurated, but already I’m feeling nostalgic for the prior occupant of the White House in an odd sort of way. So, I thought I’d compile a short list of some of my favorite GW moments just for old-time’s sake. Man, those were the days, weren’t they?

(Breaks into song)

Boy the way Steve Miller played
Songs that made the hit parade.
Guys like us we had it made,
Those were the days.

And you knew who you were then,
Girls were girls and men were men,
Mister we could use a man
Like Ronald Reagan again.

Didn't need no welfare state,
Everybody pulled his weight.
Gee our old LaBaron ran great.
Those were the days.

In no particular order:

Bush Issues a Pre-Katrina Declaration of Emergency for Louisiana Which Covers the Wrong Parishes

On or about August 25, 2005, President Bush issued a pre-emptive Statement on Federal Emergency Assistance for the State of Louisiana in light of the approaching disaster that was Hurricane Katrina. Problem was the declaration only covered the non-coastal parishes in Louisiana. Those parishes that were near or on the coast, those parishes that would ultimately take the brunt of Katrina’s wrath, were curiously not covered by the emergency declaration. You’re doing a heck-of-a job Brownie!

Bush Massages Merkel

In July of 2006, President Bush attended the G-8 Summit in St. Petersburg along with a cadre of other foreign dignitaries, including German Chancellor Angela Merkel, the only female in attendance. During the summit, with cameras rolling, Bush approached Merkel from behind while she spoke with Italian Prime Minister Romano Prodi and gave her a little rub down. A visibly startled and uncomfortable Merkel immediately threw her arms up in the air and then, as the Los Angeles Time reported, charitably “smiled.” The episode went viral and earned the President the title “Groper in Chief” by the blogosphere.

It’s Just a Goddamned Piece of Paper

In late 2005, Republican leaders met with President Bush in the oval office to discuss renewal of the USA Patriot Act. During those discussions, the President was told by the Republican leadership that his unrelenting push to renew some of the more egregious provisions of that Act could carry negative political consequences to which King George reportedly responded, "I don't give a goddamn. I'm the President and the Commander-in-Chief. Do it my way." Mr. Bush was then tactfully informed that that some of the Act’s provisions were also constitutionally suspect which evoked this little gem from the top guardian and protector of our Constitution: “Stop throwing the Constitution in my face! It's just a goddamned piece of paper!"

Fool Me Once

And finally, on September 17, 2002, President Bush was giving a speech in Nashville, Tennessee. As was often his style, the President was trying to be folksy and connect with his audience, but his penchant for malapropisms got the better of him resulting in this humorous and now infamous doozy: “There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again.”

Bonus Feature

Ok, this doesn't involve Bush per se, but since it involves a Bush and it is such a classic, I'm appending it to this post as a bonus feature.

George Herbert Walker Bush Barfs on the Japanese Prime Minister

On January 8, 1992, President George H.W. Bush attended a State dinner along with some 135 other diplomats at the home of the Japanese Prime Minister Kiichi Miyazawa. The dinner followed an evening of tennis with Japan’s Emperor described by Time’s Asia correspondent Peter McKillop as “brutal.” “[T]he Crown Prince, to use a Texas term, kicked George Bush's butt on the court. George senior is a pretty competitive guy and almost killed himself trying to cover for his lousy doubles partner, a former U.S. ambassador to Japan....” Apparently, the exertion of the tennis match caught up to the President at the state dinner where he barfed into Prime Minister Miyazawa’s lap and then fainted. The incident coined a new phrase in Japan, Bushu-suru, which means “to do the Bush thing.”

Next up: Obama really takes a bow.

No comments: